Found out my friend Ryan passed away last year. We met at the Canoga Park Art Walk a few years back…I typed him a poem, he showed me his drawings. Young guy. Potential. We stayed in touch, hanging out and talking, reflecting. The last time we talked, he told me he was focusing on recovery.

Addiction uses our mind/body as a feasting ground. How to fight back? Maybe a poem. Rest in peace, Ryan James.

“With Ink”

winter, i
   never stay, we
smile from coffee, i
   wasn’t addicted, yet

flip scratch to cook, there’s
   always the birds, but
fuck where they’re going, and
   fuck where we’ve been, I

wanted to let you crash.
The car’s gone, now. Music’s stolen,
too, but my hands don’t miss
much, these days. these days, i

   split wood to burn paper, pick
words like ash, you see it’s
   winter, now, and i

billimarie
february 3rd 2016
for ryan james – rip

Featured image is artwork by Ryan James, a gift he gave me.


12 Comments

Matt McHugh · February 3, 2016 at 1:34 PM

Nice poem. I’m sorry about Ryan.

    billimarie · February 25, 2016 at 7:50 PM

    Thanks, Matt; appreciate it.

Richard Guest · February 3, 2016 at 4:14 PM

Sorry to hear about Ryan. It’s a beautiful tribute.

    billimarie · February 25, 2016 at 7:51 PM

    Hey Richard, thanks for saying so.

sheldonk2014 · February 3, 2016 at 4:21 PM

So sorry
It’s a beautiful poem

    billimarie · February 25, 2016 at 7:51 PM

    Thanks Sheldon, hope you are well.

Richard P · February 3, 2016 at 8:02 PM

“split wood to burn paper, pick / words like ash”: I don’t know what it means but it sounds perfect.

“… and i”: great way to end, or not end, a poem inspired by an interrupted life.

    billimarie · February 25, 2016 at 8:01 PM

    I like the way it sounds too, Richard…plus the abstract imagery it provokes.

    Thanks for commenting, always appreciate your insight.

clinock · February 10, 2016 at 12:54 AM

Art is long; Life is short. Your loving poem has created a beautiful memory of Ryan

    billimarie · February 25, 2016 at 8:03 PM

    What a wonderful sentiment! Wrote it down in my journal. Thanks, John.

Ray Sharp · March 9, 2016 at 10:24 AM

Beautiful poem; sad news.

    billimarie · March 30, 2016 at 5:10 PM

    Thanks, Ray. Succinctly stated, as usual.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: